Magnificent Monday-Choose Freedom


My theme for this week is Freedom-freedom from judging…myself or others! I find it quite amazing that we as humans so often criticize each other for the way that we handle the circumstances of life. We look at others and how they deal with situations or issues and make judgments about their character because they handle a particular situation different than the way we would handle it. Who ever said we are “right?” We often impose our  standards onto others (often unconsciously) and when they do something differently than the way we would do it we are quick to judge.

Often, people’s life experiences determine how we handle what comes our way on a daily basis. Because we all have different experiences that make us who we are, we will all handle things differently. That doesn’t mean it’s right or wrong. It’s just different! Luv is allowing others to be who they are and handle life the way THEY would handle it and not the way YOU would handle it AND not criticizing them for it.

Free yourself this week! Free yourself from criticism and judgment of yourself and others. Allow yourself and others the space to evolve and grow from every situations that presents itself in your life this week. Give yourself permission to be who you are. Embrace every aspect of your personality for it makes you who you are! And resolve to have a great week no matter what comes your way!

As always, have a Magnificent Monday!

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Please Don’t Wish Me A Happy Father’s Day

Happy Father’s Day. This is a post that I originally posted last year for Father’s Day. I hope you enjoy it. Share your thoughts! 

“Happy Father’s day to all the single mothers out there!” A sentiment we hear so much on Father’s day and one that I personally believe is detrimental.  I myself have received a few text messages today wishing me a happy father’s day and I cringe at the thought of getting them. Although there are many single and divorced mother’s out there fulfilling the duties of their role as a mother and the role of father to their children they will never be a father!

I certainly understand the desire to congratulate and offer support to the many heroic women who are raising children on their own but more often than not this sentiment is used to disparage men who are not actively involved in their children’s lives. Although I am a divorced mother of four I understand that I am my children’s  mother and not their father. I understand that I will never be their father I will only be their mother. I make sure that my children understand this and never will I allow them to wish me a happy father’s day because I  sometimes fulfill the duties of both roles.

When women take on the role of being mother and father many times they start to believe that they don’t need a man in the house to help raise their children. True, there are many single women who are raising and have raised stable successful children but nothing can take the place of children having a father in the home. Fathers are needed in the home but because many women have taken on this “I don’t need a man” attitude they are not even open to the possibility of allowing a man to come in and be a part of their family. And why should they when they have been made to believe that they are both the mother and father and the presence of a man is not necessary in the lives of them and their children.

For little girls seeing this they too begin to believe that it is not necessary to have a man in the home to raise children. They see mama doing it and they often don’t learn the skills necessary to have a stable successful relationship with a man and build a family. They see their mother with children but they don’t see a man involved in those children’s lives and the cycle is perpetuated. For little boys, the message is that I can have babies but I don’t need to be involved in raising those babies because their mother can do it on her own. Their value as a future husband and father is diminished as they too see their mother raising her children on her own and being praised for it and neither do they learn the necessary skills to build a stable successful relationship with a woman. They also don’t learn the value of being a father and being a part of the lives of their women and children.

Children deserve to have a mother and a father in their lives whether their parents are still married or divorced or they are being raised by an unwed mother. Just because their parents may no longer be together doesn’t mean that they have to lose the presence of their father or someone else who is willing to fulfill the role of father in their lives. Mother’s should be mothers and understand that they can and never will be fathers. I believe that one of  the best gifts a mother can give to her children is to speak well of her children’s father even if their father is not actively present in their lives. Words spoken highly of their father to children often give children a sense of respect for him and I believe that the goal should always be to build respect even if in the mind of the mother he doesn’t deserve it.

So to all of the mothers out there that are raising children on their own I take my hat off to you but please, help your children understand the importance of having a father in their lives by just being their mother.

Repost-A Mother’s Vision




When I was a little girl my mother shared a story with me that forever impacted my life. It is a story that she still tells me to this very day and it is a story that I refer to whenever I am experiencing challenges in my life and when I have been tempted to throw in the towel.

She tells me that one day when I was a  baby she was at the train station waiting to board a train from San Bernardino to Los Angeles. She was holding me in her arms enjoying her day and an old lady walked past her. She said that as the lady passed her she stopped and turned around and walked over to where my young mother was sitting holding me. She smiled at my mother and said “That is a very special baby that you have. She is going to do great things in her life!” My mother smiled back and said “thank you” and the lady continued on her way.
There have been times in my life when I have faced what seemed to be insurmountable challenges none of which I will go into in this post. But during those times I would always remember my mothers words to me about what the lady shared with her about my life. Throughout my life my mother instinctively knew when I was experiencing those challenges and  needed to hear that story. She would always call me and tell it to me all over again as if for the first time. It has gotten me through some pretty rough times and continues to drive me even today. 
I am grateful that my mother has held that vision for me all these years and she continues to do so. I don’t even think she knows how much of an impact that it has had on my life all these years. 
To all of the mothers that are holding a vision of greatness for your children keep holding that vision for your children! Tell it to them often and let them know that they are destined to do great things. When they find themselves dealing with circumstances that are undesirable they will have their mother’s vision to fall back on and remind them to keep moving forward. 
I don’t know how I would have gotten through the rough times in my life had it not been for my mother’s luv and her continuing to tell me that story.  The beautiful thing is that I will never have to know!
Wishing all of you a very happy Mother’s day! And while you are holding that vision for your children please also remember the vision for your own life! Remember that you too are meant to do great things in this lifetime! Whatever your dream is, whatever your life’s desire is hold on to that dream and don’t let it go! For it was given to you with a purpose! 

Your Gift To Me, My Gift To You!



Fabulous morning to you EMDF family! Yesterday was my Earth/birthday and it was a most fabulous day! I have opened myself up and allowed the Divine to luv me. I have graciously accepted every gift that was offered to me without resistance. This may not sound like a big deal but you know how it is when you like to be the one giving but have a hard time allowing anyone to do anything for you? Yep, that’s me. It’s so hard sometimes to allow others to give to me but I have learned that when you don’t allow others to give to you you rob them of the joy and satisfaction they feel from being the giver. We block the flow of abundance when we don’t allow others to do their part by not receiving their gifts. 

So, in order not to block the flow I got out of the way and graciously accepted every Divine gift that was offered to me. It felt marvelous to be luv’d by so many. Family, you are so deserving of the luv that the Divine has for you so open yourself and receive it. Allow the people that have been placed in your life to operate in their gifts and let them luv you. 

In my tradition I am continuing my earthday celebration through the weekend and I want to celebrate with YOU!  I would like to continue the celebration by giving you a gift but I need something from you.  if you will, please write a comment on this post and let me know how this blog has inspired you. If there has been anything that you have read here that has helped, comforted or inspired you please let me know that in your comment. That will be your gift to me. My gift to you will something special from me. It may be a written piece, a photo or something else that I am inspired to give you but it will be something inspired by the Divine. 

Also, please leave an email address where I can reach you. If you don’t feel comfortable posting this information you can email me at: leisa@eatmydessertfirst.com. I am excited about this and I look forward to reading your comments. 

Leisa Monique

Magnificent Monday-Lift Your Head

It’s Monday, my favorite day of the week and I tell you life woke me up early this morning; earlier than I like to wake up. I had so many things on my mind that I was a bit restless. I tossed and turned and tried to go back to sleep but sleep was not to be had. For once I was actually thankful for the recent time change because had we not moved our clocks forward the hour in which I woke up from sleep would have been ridiculous.

As I lay in bed anticipating all of the growth opportunities disguised as challenges that would present themselves today (See how we create stress for ourselves when none actually exists?)I asked myself: What would I say to all the people that follow me and my writing? What would I advise them to do in this situation? I decided to do what I would tell all of you to do and do something to nourish my Spirit: Eat My Dessert First! I prayed!

In my prayer I reminded myself that none of the things on my mind were actually happening  but that I was only thinking about what I thought would happen. I reminded myself that it was a beautiful Monday morning and that in that moment everything I needed I already had. I expressed gratitude for not only having all of my and my children’s needs met but for the Spirit of gratitude.

In that moment a song came up in my Spirit, a song that I used to luv so very much but that I hadn’t listened to in many years. It was a song that we used to sing when I was in the church choir and it nourished my soul every time I heard it. I searched for and found it on the internet and just like before it nourished my soul.

Listening to it reminded me that there was nothing that I needed to be worrying about. It reminded me of who I AM. I am listening to it as I write this and I can hardly sit still; I just want to get up and dance! I want to sing! I’m in Peace and all the concerns that wouldn’t let me sleep this morning are gone. I know that there is nothing that can disturb my peace because I have everything that I need in this moment.

I’m grateful for this experience because it served as a reminder to me no matter what challenges I face I am already equipped to face them. It reminded me that no matter what the challenge is that presents itself the solution is within the challenge and I just have to sit in stillness and wait for the solution to emerge.

I am including this song for you this morning. Listen to it. Allow the words to nourish your soul and Spirit. Lift your head no matter what challenges you are facing today. Know that you are well equipped to face them and that everything you need you already have within you. Remember that the challenges we are presented with are just what we need in that moment and that is has come for our growth.

Wishing you a most Magnificent Monday of peace, luv and growth. Enjoy your day and as always, Eat Your Dessert First!

Leisa Monique

Repost-Magnificent Monday-The Teacher That Is Close By

Magnificent Monday to you all! I trust that you have taken this beautiful Monday morning to set the tone for the rest of your week. I trust that you have decided that no matter what today or the rest of this week brings to you, you will face it with the courage of a spiritual warrior and trust that it has come because it is what you need in that moment. 

I am reposting a previous piece that I wrote because as I meditated on what to share with you today it kept coming up. The message is precisely what I wanted to share with you and I saw no need to write something else when this piece is perfect. Enjoy it…again!! 

Leisa Monique

I’m a firm believer that there is nothing or no one that comes into our lives that shouldn’t be there at the moment which they appear. Whether in the form of homelessness, unemployment, health issues, relationship issues, family issues or people, I believe that what shows up in our lives is exactly what we need in that moment to evolve and grow and to move to our next level.

Upa Guru is a Sanskrit word that is translated ” The teacher that is close by.” Anyone or anything can serve as your Upa Guru and they come to offer us exactly what it is that we are to learn from their being there. It is up to us to accept the lesson they have come bearing.

There are certain situations or “challenges” that life brings us that not only would we rather not go through, but some of us consider them attacks concocted by the “devil” himself to try and take us out. Now whether you believe in the “devil” is another story and not the point of this post.The point is that once we change our perspective on what is happening in our lives and see it as our Upa Guru, we will be able to find peace in what we are going through.

What you are facing at this moment in your life has been Divinely crafted just for you. It’s your journey. And what you encounter on each step of your journey is bringing you closer to the destiny that you were created to fulfill. You have been equipped for this journey and there is nothing that you face that you are not already able to handle. Inherent in every problem that you encounter is the solution waiting to emerge. But it’s up to you to use the gifts, the talents and the skills that you posses to discover it.

The people and situations that you encounter on this journey are there simply to help these gifts, talents and skills that are within you to emerge. They are there to support your evolution. No matter what you think of these people or situations, they have come to assist you on your way to greatness. They may irritate you, hurt you or anger you but understand that they are ultimately there to help you. They are your Upa Guru, your teacher and when the lesson is learned they return to being what they were before.

No matter what it is that you are currently experiencing understand that it is exactly what you need in this moment to evolve. It is here for your highest good. I encourage you to embrace your Upa Guru, to go within and find out what they have come to teach you. I understand that this process is not easy as most of us are conditioned to resist the challenges that present themselves. We are not taught that challenges are opportunities in disguise. But the moment you change your thinking about your current circumstances is the moment that you will begin to find peace, joy and happiness in what you are experiencing.

When challenges show up ask yourself “what is this here to teach me? What am I to learn from this and how do I evolve from this.” As difficult as it may be for you to do, drop your resistance and accept the moment as it is and not what you want it to be. Instead of looking at it as a problem look at is as your Upa Guru that has come to move you forward. don’t try to force an outcome or change the situation as that can cause more frustration, sadness and even depression because you are not getting the desired results of your efforts. Instead,  just accept is as it is and trust that all is in Divine order and that you have everything you need in this moment. You will be thankful that you did.

Be Wonder-Full

“Some of the most wonderful people are the ones who don`t fit into boxes.” 
― Tori Amos


“Don’t you know how sweet and wonderful life can be?” 
― Marvin Gaye


“Life is about taking what’s given to us and creating something wonderful.” 
― Belinda JeffreyOne Long Thread



Be ever, be ever wonderful, stay as you are, alrightTime is right in your life tonightFind your place in the broad day light, yeahOoh, stay as you are~ Earth, Wind & Fire

The word “Wonderful or “Wonder-Full” (full of wonder) as I like to say is what filled my mind and Spirit last night and this morning during meditation. I think about the wonder of creation and of us all and I simply wanted to tell you all to BE your wonder-full selves. Earth, Wind and Fire says it best so please enjoy the video above. 

In our society we are conditioned to think that we have to be DO-ing something in order to be valuable but don’t you know that you are valuable just because you are here?! You are already magnificent and wonder-full. You don’t have to DO anything to earn this it simply already IS.  The Wonder of creation and the Divine fills you. It is the essence of you and can fuel the life that you desire to live if you will let it. Let go of any notion that you have to DO something to be as you already are-full of wonder! Any success or accomplishments adds to what you already are it doesn’t create it. 

We all want to be successful and to be significant. We want to know that we matter. But success on the worlds terms isn’t what creates your value-you were born valuable. What you create with it is totally up to you! 

In Dessert, 

Leisa Monique